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Tjolbi=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Tue Nov 26, 2013 8:56 pm |
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Ostracised! |
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Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2005 3:41 pm Posts: 9042 Location: cooking nades in the backyard
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_________________ The banhammer thirsts for tards | There is no 'overkill'. There is only 'open fire' and 'I need to reload'.
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happyslappy
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Tue Jan 14, 2014 5:28 pm |
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that was a stupid comment btw |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:40 pm Posts: 109345 Location: manchester
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Last night I reached for my liquid viagra and accidentally swigged from a bottle of Tippex.
I woke this morning with a huge correction
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happyslappy
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Tue Jan 14, 2014 5:28 pm |
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that was a stupid comment btw |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:40 pm Posts: 109345 Location: manchester
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The wife suggested I get myself one of those penis enlargers ....... so I did....
she's 21 and her name's Lucy
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Lemon =GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Tue Jan 14, 2014 11:20 pm |
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an unsung hero! |
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Joined: Tue Jun 29, 2004 1:13 am Posts: 5852 Location: on the run from the boyz i love this city
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_________________ "If your going to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite."- Winston Churchill three and a half foot long??? dude, it could have swallowed you whole! 3jorn=GCHQ=
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And
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Tue Jan 14, 2014 11:53 pm |
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Bow down to the master |
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Joined: Thu Mar 04, 2004 11:22 pm Posts: 2036 Location: U will know.. when I kill u
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 Something funny from Slaps, that is rare.
_________________  .................................. FYI: Donald Duck = Anders And (in Danish) 
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happyslappy
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 12:26 pm |
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that was a stupid comment btw |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:40 pm Posts: 109345 Location: manchester
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A woman was asked,
“When you are a ripe old age, and had to pick one, which would you choose: Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s?”
This wise lady answered,
“Definitely Parkinson’s -- better to spill half my wine than to forget where I put the bottle.”
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And
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 5:08 pm |
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Bow down to the master |
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Joined: Thu Mar 04, 2004 11:22 pm Posts: 2036 Location: U will know.. when I kill u
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Haha that's a good one.
_________________  .................................. FYI: Donald Duck = Anders And (in Danish) 
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Tjolbi=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 6:32 pm |
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Ostracised! |
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Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2005 3:41 pm Posts: 9042 Location: cooking nades in the backyard
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haha 
_________________ The banhammer thirsts for tards | There is no 'overkill'. There is only 'open fire' and 'I need to reload'.
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happyslappy
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2014 1:17 pm |
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that was a stupid comment btw |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:40 pm Posts: 109345 Location: manchester
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Got a great line for girls, It doesn't matter how beautiful they are, it works every time.
"Does this damp cloth smell like chloroform to you"?
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happyslappy
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2014 1:19 pm |
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that was a stupid comment btw |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:40 pm Posts: 109345 Location: manchester
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Two young brothers were talking in their bedroom one morning.
'You know what ?' says the 7 year old, 'It's about time we started swearing.'
His 4 year old brother nods his head in approval.
'When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'll swear first and then you swear after me, okay ?'
'Okay, okay,' the four year old agrees with enthusiasm.
The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the seven year old what he wants for breakfast. 'I'll have some of that Weetabix shite !' he says.
WHACK! He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up and ran upstairs, crying his eyes out.
She looked at the 4 year old and asked in a stern voice, 'And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man ?'
'I don't know,' he blubbers, 'but it won't be fecking Weetabix !'
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Tjolbi=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2014 5:51 pm |
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Ostracised! |
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Joined: Wed Jun 01, 2005 3:41 pm Posts: 9042 Location: cooking nades in the backyard
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_________________ The banhammer thirsts for tards | There is no 'overkill'. There is only 'open fire' and 'I need to reload'.
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nicey=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2014 11:09 pm |
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it is I! Diabetes man! |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 1:15 pm Posts: 14174 Location: anywhere but nowhere
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My fecking neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that 2:30am?!
Luckily for him i was still up playing my drums............
_________________   Went to a zoo, they only had one animal there, a dog............. It was a shitzu.... I’z leakin… bring amberlamps
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nicey=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2014 12:13 am |
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it is I! Diabetes man! |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 1:15 pm Posts: 14174 Location: anywhere but nowhere
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rosie and lemons missus spent forty quid on ebay for a penis enlarger....... they each got a magnifying glass...... 
_________________   Went to a zoo, they only had one animal there, a dog............. It was a shitzu.... I’z leakin… bring amberlamps
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nicey=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2014 12:15 am |
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it is I! Diabetes man! |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 1:15 pm Posts: 14174 Location: anywhere but nowhere
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i told my my smartarse son it's going to be a nightmare this winter with this flu outbreak. he said tell me something he don't know.
I replied your mums arse can take my whole fist.
_________________   Went to a zoo, they only had one animal there, a dog............. It was a shitzu.... I’z leakin… bring amberlamps
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nicey=GCHQ=
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Post subject: Re: Last night - another lemon style joke Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2014 12:20 am |
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it is I! Diabetes man! |
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Joined: Wed Mar 03, 2004 1:15 pm Posts: 14174 Location: anywhere but nowhere
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Asked the wife for a wank last night. She started rubbing my cock with a keyring. Perhaps it's just me, but I felt like I was being fobbed off!
_________________   Went to a zoo, they only had one animal there, a dog............. It was a shitzu.... I’z leakin… bring amberlamps
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